Tuesday, September 6, 2011

My Dog Gets Bored


I often times have days like this. They go on and on, and just look like this. I am a very busy person, truly, but sometimes I just want to have a day like this.

That should be fine, right?

Not according to my dog. No, MY dog doesn't allow for it. This could be considered a pro or a con for owning a large dog, depending on how you look at it.



I can tell when she's starting to get bored because she sits up.

And sits.

And sits.

And sits.

No noise, just... a faint buzzing in the back of your mind that you KNOW is coming from her.

She blocks the TV and STARES. This is an animation of what she looks like. Watch it for about half an hour and you'll get the idea of what it's like when she gets in this mood:
 


 As soon as you break your concentration for any reason, she will place one single paw gingerly on your lap. She knows victory is forthcoming.



If this doesn't work, she proceeds to the next step: VIOLENCE.

In her feeble, feeble mind, violence consists of sitting on people.


This goes on until one of us gives up.


And that's why I love my dog.

Sunday, September 4, 2011

School D'L'arte

Welcome! As you know, I am extremely well-known for my amazing art. Here I will give you some insight into the process I go through to make my art a reality.

STEP 1, SUBJECT:

First you must decide what you are feeling. Draw those feelings. If you're not sure how you feel, draw several different subjects with different emotions on display. Here, we can see someone who is clearly angry, someone who seems to be in awe, brought to tears, and someone who is perhaps smiling, gesturing to his angry friend.

STEP 2, FOREGROUND:

Now you must add depth to your picture. Here, I have added someone in the foreground. This adds a lot of depth to the picture. We now wonder what is happening, and can gain insight into what the other three people in the image are thinking.

STEP 3, FINE DETAIL:

Add some fine details to your image. Here, I added some sweat glistening on the brow of the person in the foreground, whom I have named Pyotr. All of a sudden, we can feel that perhaps he is nervous.

STEP 4, HORIZON:

Add a horizon line. Now we have established that nobody is floating, and that there is space. Good job!

CONCLUSION:

I hope you have learned a little something about my process, and that you have done a little getting to know the real me. I look forward to seeing YOU, my STUDENT, use these valuable techniques in the future.

You're welcome.

Worst Week Ever

I had a bad week, so I decided to start a blog.

That's what you do, right?

On saturday, I took my dog (and some friends and the Manfriend) to a big major park, and it was fun. I guess technically they took me.

It's labor day weekend, so the campsites were full. I hope no bears try to infiltrate anybody's plans like in my illustration.


I'll admit it. These are old pics and that story was told purely as a way to shoehorn them in. This is mostly just a test run anyway. I promise the images will be better in the future. Maybe. I mean, not better drawn. That will never happen. They will be better quality, as in I will "draw" them directly on my tablet instead of taking a picture of a drawing I made. Long live high standards!

Also bees can go to hell.